Escape to Ohio: Unbelievable Sonesta Suites Sharonville Deal!
Escape to Ohio? More Like ESCAPE FROM REALITY (and a Good Deal at Sonesta Suites Sharonville!)
Okay, let's be real, Ohio isn't exactly the first place that pops into your head when you're dreaming of a vacation. But hey, life throws you curveballs (or maybe you're just looking for a budget-friendly getaway), and sometimes a trip to the Midwest is exactly what the doctor ordered. And this “Unbelievable Sonesta Suites Sharonville Deal”? Well, it actually was pretty unbelievable. Seriously, I almost didn't believe the price.
But first, a disclaimer: I'm no travel blogger. This isn't some polished, perfectly-curated review. This is just me, rambling about my experience, warts and all.
Accessibility: (Ugh, Let's Get This Out of the Way)
Okay, so accessibility. The website said it was accessible. And for the most part, it was. Elevators, ramps, the whole shebang. Look, I'm not in a wheelchair, but I appreciate when places try. The halls were wide, the doors were… well, they were doors. Honestly, I didn’t spend a huge amount of time obsessing over accessibility features (that's just not my thing, I didn't really check). Anyway…
Internet & Tech: Because We All Need Our Fix (and Free Wi-Fi is a Godsend!)
Free Wi-Fi? HELL YES. I am utterly dependent on the internet. It's my lifeline, my source of comedy cat videos, and my way of pretending I’m productive while actually procrastinating. The Sonesta Suites delivered. Wi-Fi in the rooms was strong enough to stream, which is a HUGE win. There was also, apparently, LAN access, but who even uses LAN anymore? My pre-teen self is silently judging me for even bringing this up.
Cleanliness & Safety: The Post-Pandemic Checklist (and My Anxiety)
Okay, so this is where things get serious, and I'm admitting my inner germaphobe. COVID has messed with me. But Sonesta Suites was doing their best, and that counts for a lot.
- Anti-viral cleaning products: Check.
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Check.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Check.
- Room sanitization opt-out available: Uhm, I'm not opting out of that, thank you very much.
- Hand sanitizer: Every. Single. Corner. Literally.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: Felt that way, at least. They wore masks, which is always a good start.
- Safe dining setup: Yep.
It felt clean. And in these uncertain times, that’s half the battle won. I even saw them wiping down the elevator buttons multiple times. Seriously, I was impressed. It really did make me feel safer, which is a massive relief.
Dining, Drinking & Snacking: Fueled by Coffee and an Unhealthy Obsession with Buffets
Now we're talking! I’m not going to lie, I was most looking forward to the feeding of the human being.
- Breakfast [buffet]: Oh, the buffet! (I'm drooling just remembering it). A glorious spread. Scrambled eggs that… well, they were eggs. But there were also waffles, bacon, pastries, and… COFFEE. And let me tell you, the coffee was STRONG. Like, "I can conquer the world and maybe clean my apartment" strong.
- Coffee shop: Also, coffee. But like, actual, good coffee? I grabbed a latte from their coffee shop and it was delish. I'm honestly a coffee snob, and I was pleasantly surprised.
- Poolside Bar: Didn’t get to the pool bar because the pool was still closed, sadly.
- Restaurants: There were a couple of restaurants on-site, and, I mean, they weren’t Michelin-star quality but did the job. A lot of the food was kinda meh, but it's a hotel restaurant, so what do you expect? At least there was an a la carte in restaurant option!
- Room service [24-hour]: The most tempting option during my stay! Ordered some fries around 2 am. No shame.
- Snack bar: Very clutch! Got me through, like, three separate late-night cravings. All the essentials: pretzels, chips, and candy.
Services & Conveniences: Perks, Perks, Everywhere!
- Concierge: Didn't need them, but good to know they were there.
- Daily housekeeping: My room was tidied up daily.
- Laundry service: Needed! I didn't want to smell like airport food for my whole trip.
- Luggage storage: This was excellent. I got there way early.
- Air conditioning in public area/room: God sent, especially in Ohio.
- Cash withdrawal: Didn’t need.
- Convenience store: You could get a bottle of Gatorade at that place.
- Elevator: Excellent.
- Ironing service: The iron was good.
- Security [24-hour]: Always a good feeling to know you're safe.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (or How I Spent My Time in Ohio)
- Fitness center: I intended to use the gym. I really did. I even packed my workout clothes. But then… the buffet. And the fries. And the endless supply of coffee. Maybe next time.
- Swimming pool [outdoor]: The outdoor pool was actually closed during my stay. Huge bummer!
- Spa/sauna: I didn’t delve into this part of the hotel.
For the Kids (or, I Pretend to be a Kid)
- Family/child friendly: Seemed like it! There were families everywhere.
- Babysitting service: Didn’t need but it’s a pretty cool offer.
- Kids meal: Good to know.
In-Room Goodies: Cozy Comforts (and a Slight Obsession with Pillows)
My room was… fine. Don't get me wrong, it was clean and comfortable, especially with the "Escape to Ohio" deal.
- Air conditioning: Absolutely essential.
- Alarm clock: Standard.
- Bathrobes: A nice touch.
- Blackout curtains: Crucial for sleeping off the buffet coma.
- Coffee/tea maker: Important. I swear I thrive on caffeine.
- Desk: Productive! At least, productive-ish…
- Free bottled water: Always appreciated.
- Laptop workspace: A desk, that's fine.
- Non-smoking: Yay!
- Refrigerator: Perfect for stashing leftovers (or, you know, more coffee).
- Safety/security feature: Safe box, always good.
- Wi-Fi [free]: The god of all hotel room features.
My One Big Experience:
The most memorable thing, and the thing I still chuckle about, was the pure bliss of the bed. I am not exaggerating when I say it was like sleeping on a cloud. And the pillows? Oh. My. God. There were so many, of varying sizes and firmness. They were practically begging me to sink in and never leave. I experimented with various pillow configurations, building little pillow forts, and generally acting like a ridiculous adult. The sheer comfort of that bed was enough to redeem the entire trip, turning a potentially "meh" experience into a genuinely pleasant one. I honestly considered stealing a pillow. (I didn't. But the temptation was real).
Getting Around:
- Car park [free of charge]: Huge win.
- Taxi service: Don't have to use.
Conclusion (and a Final, Somewhat Unprofessional Thought)
So, would I recommend the Sonesta Suites Sharonville? For the price, absolutely. It's a solid, clean, comfortable hotel. The staff was friendly, the Wi-Fi was reliable, and the bed was a literal dream. The buffet… well, let's just say it was a culinary experience. Ohio itself? Well, that's another story. (But honestly, there are worse places to escape to, especially on the cheap).
SEO & Metadata:
- Title: Escape to Ohio: Unbelievable Sonesta Suites Sharonville Deal! (Honest Review)
- Keywords: Sonesta Suites Sharonville, Ohio hotels, hotel review, affordable hotels, free Wi-Fi, buffet breakfast, clean hotel, Sharonville deals, Midwest getaway, family-friendly hotel, accessible hotel, travel review.
- Meta Description: Honest and quirky review of the Sonesta Suites Sharonville: Was it worth the "Unbelievable Deal"? Find out if this Ohio hotel offers good value, clean rooms, and a dream bed! The good, the bad, and the ridiculously comfy pillows revealed.
- Category: Travel, Hotel Reviews, Midwest Travel
- Rating: 4/5 stars
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's itinerary. This is a real attempt to wrangle a trip to Sonesta ES Suites Sharonville West, a trip that may or may not involve a significant amount of caffeine and questionable life choices. Let's dive in. And by dive, I mean… stumble in.
Sonesta ES Suites Sharonville West: Survival Guide & "Things I Actually Did" Itinerary
Day 1: The Arrival & The Great Unpacking Debacle (or, "Why Did I Pack So Much?")
- 2:00 PM (ish): Arrive at Sonesta. Okay, let's be honest, "arrive" is generous. More like, slowly and unsteadily roll into the parking lot after a drive that felt approximately the length of the Oregon Trail. I swear, traffic on I-71 is a special form of hell designed to test the patience of even the most zen monks.
- Quirky Observation: The guy checking in ahead of me was wearing Crocs and a t-shirt that said, "I'm with stupid." Irony is delicious, isn't it?
- 2:15 PM: Check-in. Smooth enough. The front desk person was actually too cheerful. Are they hiding something? Are the bedbugs extra cuddly this year? I can’t fully relax from my own paranoia.
- 2:30 PM: The Room Revelation: Ok, room's good. It's… functional. Think slightly-above-average college dorm room. My first thought, always, is: "Where's the fridge?" My second, always: "How long until I can order pizza?"
- 2:45 PM - Forever: UNPACKING. This is where the wheels usually fall off. I over-packed, as usual. It's like I'm preparing for Armageddon, not a three-day stay in Ohio. The suitcase explodes, revealing a horrifying array of clothes, shoes, and "just in case" items. I realize I have three pairs of jeans and only one pair of actual hiking boots. Genius.
- Emotional Reaction: Anger at my past self. The sheer weight of the luggage is an indication I should just hire a Sherpa.
- Messy Structure: I realize I left my phone charger in the car. Sigh.
- 3:30 PM: Officially Declared "Hungry." Scavenge. The tiny kitchenette is… well, it's there. There's a microwave, which is a win.
- 4:00 PM: Pizza Rescue: Okay, here we go. Time to order a ridiculous amount of pizza. Papa John's it is!
- Opinionated Language: Papa John's? Fine. Sometimes, you just need the comfort of mediocrity.
- 5:00 PM: Pizza arrives. Glorious, greasy, cheesy salvation. Eat. Watch some incredibly trashy TV. Zone out. This is what vacations are for, right?
Day 2: Adventures in Sharonville & The "I Need More Coffee" Phenomenon
- 8:00 AM: Wake up. Or, struggle to wake up. Hotel coffee is… well, it’s better than nothing, which is the only thing I got at home. Fuel up.
- 9:00 AM: The Great Outdoors (Kinda): Okay, let's try to be somewhat active. I'm going to attempt to visit Sharon Woods. It’s supposed to be beautiful. Wish me luck.
- Minor Category: Breakfast. I grab the complimentary breakfast. The mini-muffins are hard as rocks. The eggs… well, they resemble something. But I'm not judging. It’s free.
- 9:30 AM (or, 10:00 AM, depending on traffic and my ability to locate my car keys): Arrive at Sharon Woods. The park is actually…really nice. Green, trees, a lake, a path. I feel like a human again!
- Anecdote: I almost tripped over a squirrel. He gave me a look of utter disdain, as if I were personally responsible for his missing acorn.
- 11:00 AM: Hiking is done. The trail was longer than I thought. I feel slightly less like a couch potato and slightly more like a sweaty, slightly sunburned potato.
- 12:00 PM: Lunch Quest: Yelp for lunch places. The reviews are mixed. I opt for a local burger place.
- 1:00 PM: The Burger Experience: The burger place is packed. The burger is greasy and delicious. No regrets.
- Stream-of-consciousness: I should probably drink more water. I should probably exercise more. But, hey, the burger was good. Maybe later on the water and the exercise.
- 2:30 PM: Back to the hotel. Nap time.
- 4:00 PM: Shopping (Or, An Attempt): Head out for some shopping. The shopping malls in the area seem like labyrinths of consumerist temptation. I end up buying things. A pair of shoes. An impulse buy, obviously. Regret it later, but it's too late.
- Emotional Reaction: A blend of excitement and buyer's remorse.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner & A Movie (Metaphorically Speaking): Order more takeout. Watch more TV. Repeat. Consider the movie thing a metaphor.
Day 3: The Departure & Existential Questions (and, "Did I Actually Enjoy This?")
- 9:00 AM: Wake up. Coffee. The caffeine dependency is real.
- 9:30 AM: The Last Breakfast: More hotel breakfast. Same muffins, still rock-like.
- 10:00 AM: Leisurely Packing: Okay, this time, I’m more organized. Liar. The suitcase explodes again.
- Imperfections: Realize I left a sock in the drawer. Seriously?
- 11:00 AM: Final Hotel Room Inspection: Check for forgotten belongings. A quick once-over, then out the door.
- 12:00 PM: Check-Out: Seamless. They didn't realize I'd accidentally stolen a hotel pen. Whoops!
- 12:30 PM: The Drive Home (The Long Haul): The drive back. Traffic is thankfully lighter. My brain is still trying to process if, in fact, I'd had a good time.
- Emotional Reaction: A weird mix of exhaustion, relief, and a vague sense of "What was the point?" But also, a weird sense of calm from not being at work.
- 2:00 PM: (Or, Whenever) The Unpacking (Again): Back home. Unpacking round three. I vow to be more organized on my next trip.
- Opinionated Language: I guarantee I won't be. I'm me.
- 3:00 PM: The Post-Trip Reflection: Did I have fun? Yes. Was it perfect? Absolutely not. Would I do it again? Eventually.
Conclusion:
So, there you have it. Sonesta ES Suites Sharonville West. It wasn't glamorous. It may not be award-winning. But it was… an experience. And hey, I survived. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go lie down.
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Escape to Ohio: Sonesta Suites Sharonville - The Real Deal (Or Is It?) - FAQ's from Someone Who Actually Went (And Maybe Regrets It... Kidding!)
Okay, Seriously... Is This Sonesta Suites Deal *Really* "Unbelievable?"
What's the "Catch"? There's ALWAYS a Catch, Right?
The Room: Was it Like, Clean? My Biggest Fear!
What's the Deal with the Breakfast? The "Free Breakfast" Dilemma.
Sharonville: Is There Anything *To Do* There? I'm Not Just Staying in My Room the Whole Time, Am I?
The Pool: Did You Risk it? (And Risk Covid?)
The Staff: Annoying or Actually Helpful? Crucial Information!
My Biggest Regret… or Maybe Not:
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