
Grand Riviera Princess Family Fun: Your All-Inclusive Playa Del Carmen Paradise!
Alright, Buckle Up Buttercups: A Review That Doesn't Pull Any Punches
Okay, so I just spent a week (or was it a blur of sunshine and questionable decisions?) at… well, let's just call it "The Grand Splurge Hotel" for now. Because honestly, after wading through all the amenities they claimed to have, the "Splurge" felt more like a… well, you'll see. Prepare for a rollercoaster, folks. This isn't a sterile, corporate review. This is real.
SEO & Metadata Stuff (Before I Go Full Meltdown)
- Keywords: Grand Splurge Hotel review, hotel accessibility, wheelchair access, free wifi, spa review, fitness center, dining review, room amenities, cleanliness, safety protocols, Covid-19 hotel response, luxury hotel, hotel amenities, on-site restaurants, swimming pool, hotel review, travel review.
- Meta Description: Honest and detailed review of The Grand Splurge Hotel, covering accessibility, dining, amenities, cleanliness, and overall experience. Read about the ups, downs, and unexpected quirks!
The Great Accessibility Quest:
First things first. I'm not using a wheelchair myself, BUT I watched this poor woman struggling with a ramp that looked steeper than Everest. So, the "Wheelchair Accessible" box is partially checked, maybe? The elevators seemed alright, but the lack of automatic door openers in some areas? Come on, Grand Splurge, it's 2024! Grade: C- (needs serious improvement)
- Accessibility overall: The hotel boasts "Facilities for disabled guests", but I'm seeing that the execution is off.
Food Glorious Food… (and the Occasional Stomach Ache)
Let's be real, food is crucial. It can make or break a trip, and this hotel? Well, it offered a veritable smorgasbord of options. I'm talking:
- Restaurants, Restaurants Everywhere: They have “Restaurants” plural!. I saw a "Vegetarian restaurant" (I went, it was… fine), and a "Western cuisine in restaurant" (tried it, also fine.) The "Asian cuisine in restaurant" was actually pretty good.
- The Breakfast Binge (and the Aftermath): The "Breakfast [buffet]" was a monster. Everything from "Asian breakfast" to omelets cooked to order. The "Coffee/tea in restaurant" was a plus. The "Breakfast takeaway service" I used once because I overslept, and it was decent. The "Breakfast in room" I didn't even look at. Okay, my stomach hasn't been the same since.
- The Poolside Bar: Okay, this part was pretty dreamy. "Poolside bar" with actual decent cocktails, I can't complain.
- The Room Service Ritual: Their "Room service [24-hour]" was a lifesaver after one particularly long day of… well, I’m not sure what I was doing, but I needed a burger. It was… surprisingly good.
Grade: B+ (for sheer quantity, subtracting points for the questionable after effects of the buffet)
Relaxation Stations: Spa, Sauna, and My Near-Death Experience
Okay, the Spa. The "Pool with view" was spectacular, the "Steamroom" a sweaty delight, and the "Spa" was what I wanted. "Massage" was great. I even managed a "Body scrub" and "Body wrap".
- The Hot Water Nightmare: The "Sauna" was fine. But the "Foot bath". I tried the foot bath and nearly burned my feet off. Grade: A- (minus a few for the foot bath)
Keeping Clean (Or, The Sanitizer Struggle Bus)
They claim they're on top of "Cleanliness and safety". The "Anti-viral cleaning products" were apparently used, and the staff was "trained in safety protocol." They had "Hand sanitizer" everywhere, which was good. The "Room sanitization opt-out available", but the "Individual food portions" are what I was worried about. I thought about the "Daily disinfection in common areas," but honestly, didn't believe them. It felt like the "Professional-grade sanitizing services" only hit certain spots.
Grade: B- (because I'm still alive, but I have trust issues now)
The Rooms: Cozy, Confusing, and Occasionally Creature-Filled
Let's talk about the rooms. The "Air conditioning" was a lifesaver. The "Blackout curtains" were a must. The "Bed" was, thankfully, extra long.I really enjoyed the "Bathrobes"! They have "Alarm clock", "Bathroom phone", "Closet", "Coffee/tea maker", "Complimentary tea", "Desk", "Extra long bed", "Free bottled water", "Hair dryer", "In-room safe box", "Ironing facilities", "Laptop workspace", "Linens", "Mini bar", "Mirror", "On-demand movies", "Private bathroom", "Reading light", "Refrigerator", "Satellite/cable channels", "Scale", "Seating area", "Separate shower/bathtub", "Shower", "Slippers", "Smoke detector", "Socket near the bed", "Sofa", "Soundproofing", "Telephone", "Toiletries", "Towels", "Umbrella", "Wake-up service", "Wi-Fi [free]", "Window that opens"
- The Interconnecting Room Mystery: We booked an "Interconnecting room(s) available", but it wasn't.
- The Non-smoking Note: The "Non-smoking" made things a tad better. Still, the "Safety/security feature".
Grade: C (for the sheer weirdness)
Odds and Ends (Because Life is Messy)
- Internet Access: The "Internet access – wireless" was… spotty, let's be polite. The "Internet access – LAN" didn't work at all.
- Conveniences: "Concierge" looked busy.. "Express check-in/out", but took forever.
- For the Kids: "Babysitting service" unavailable. "Family/child friendly".
- Location, Location, Location: The "Airport transfer" made a huge difference.
The Final Verdict: Could Be Better, But…
Look, The Grand Splurge Hotel wasn't perfect. It had its moments of brilliance (the poolside bar!), its moments of sheer frustration (the elevator!), and its moments where I wondered if I'd accidentally stumbled into a parallel universe. But would I go back? Maybe. With lowered expectations, a strong dose of hand sanitizer, and a very specific list of demands. Overall Grade: C+ (with potential for improvement… definitely.)
Boston Harbor Hotel: Your Dream Boston Getaway Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, Buttercup, because this ain't your grandma's itinerary. This is my survival guide for a week at the Family Club at Grand Riviera Princess in Playa del Carmen. And frankly? I’m already pre-emptively exhausted. Wish me luck.
Pre-Trip Meltdown (The Week Before)
Monday: The Great Suitcase Scramble. I swear, every time I travel, it's like wrestling an angry octopus. Clothes everywhere. Sunscreen explosions (always). Searching for that one swimsuit that makes me look remotely like I haven't eaten an entire lasagna. Found it! But it’s… seen better days. Ah well. Survival of the fittest, right? Also, panicked googling: "Is it too late to learn Spanish?" (spoiler: yes).
Tuesday: Passport Panic. Literally almost had a mental breakdown because I couldn't find my passport. Turns out? It was… in my purse, where I always put it. Sigh. Added “Check Passport 10 Times” to the to-do list. Right next to “Don’t forget the Dramamine. You know, for the Dramamine effect.”
Wednesday: The Pre-Trip Diet Debacle. Okay, I tried to eat healthy. Keyword: tried. Crumbs of a pizza, some leftover pasta, and a desperate apple that I couldn't quite finish, and the remnants of a candy bar. Let’s just say the bikini isn't the only thing that's seen better days…
Thursday: Packing Day. I always overpack. Because what if the apocalypse happens while I'm lounging by a pool and I suddenly need a formal gown? I can't just be caught unprepared. Ended up with three books despite promising myself, "only one." Added the book I'd read on the plane to the list.
Friday: Final Preparations and a Sudden Surge Of Doubt. Last-minute errands, printer chaos, and a sudden wave of “What have I done?” What if the food’s awful? What if I get sunburned within the first hour? What if, God forbid, my kids actually enjoy the kids club and leave me alone to deal with all the all-inclusive-ness? I do not expect to get use to the resort’s many perks.
Saturday: Travel Day: The Airport Gauntlet
- 5:00 AM: The alarm from hell. Groan. Coffee, coffee, and more coffee.
- 6:00 AM: The drive to the airport. Praying for no traffic (spoiler alert: there’s always traffic).
- 7:00 AM: Airport chaos. Lines. Tears (mine, partially because of the early hour and the passport situation). Luggage check-in. Praying my suitcase makes it to Mexico and doesn't end up in, I don't know, Siberia.
- 8:00 AM: Security. Removed my shoes, belt, jewelry. Survived. Barely.
- 9:00 AM: The flight! Praying the kids don’t kick the seat in front of them the entire time. (They probably will). Trying – and failing – to read my book whilst the cabin noise is deafening.
- 12:00 PM (EST): LANDED! Hallelujah! The glorious smell of… the Caribbean air? No. It was bug spray, most certainly.
- 1:00 PM: Transfer to the Hotel– The bus driver seemed to think he was in a rally race. I’m pretty sure my stomach is now in my throat. The scenery is stunning, though. Palm trees swaying, turquoise water… I can already feel the stress melting away. (Just kidding. It hasn’t).
- 2:00 PM: Check-in. Ah, the sweet, sweet, sound of “Welcome to the Grand Riviera Princess!” (That'll get old fast).
Day 1: Settling In and Poolside Panic
- 3:00 PM: Room Reveal. Okay, it's nice. Clean-ish. The air conditioning works. The view? Mostly palm trees, which is fine, but I requested a "partial ocean view" . Minor annoyance, but I'll survive.
- 3:30 PM: The pool. Oh, the pool! I'm torn between wanting to relax and wanting to make sure the kids don't accidentally drown themselves or, worse, get chummy with a swarm of other children. I choose a chair that offers partial shade. Success!
- 4:00 PM: Poolside drinks! Margaritas. Obviously. (My first mistake. They're deceptively strong).
- 5:00 PM: Kid's Club Reconnaissance. Peeking in. It looks… chaotic. But the kids seem to like it? Maybe… maybe I’ll have some time to myself. (Probably not).
- 6:00 PM: Dinner. Buffet. The buffet. A glorious, overwhelming, buffet. I'm already overwhelmed. I start circling, evaluating, and feeling like I'm in a culinary Hunger Games. Found the pizza. Excellent. The pasta. Acceptable. Attempt the tacos? Questionable.
- 7:00 PM: The show. Ugh, a show. I'm tired. But the kids are excited. It's a… magic show? With sparkly outfits and an overenthusiastic magician who reminds me of a cheesy Vegas act. But the kids love it, and honestly? It's kind of endearing.
- 8:00 PM: Bedtime (for the kids… not me, yet). I have a margarita to finish, a book to attempt to read, and a deep desire to not be woken up at 6 AM. (Wish me luck.)
Day 2: Beach Bliss? …or Beach Blasts?
- 9:00 AM: Sleep! Maybe. The kids woke up at 6 am. I did not. But, coffee is my friend.
- 10:00 AM: The beach! White sand, turquoise water… It’s postcard-perfect. Until the wind picks up and blows sand everywhere. Into my hair, in my eyes, in my teeth. My meticulously-applied sunscreen is now a grainy, sandy mess. The kids want to build a sandcastle. They argue. They fight. They complain. They decide to bury themselves in the sand. I spend the next half hour trying to dig them out.
- 11:00 AM: Beach Bar. A much-needed Piña Colada. (This time, I'll pace myself. Sort of.) Watching the ocean waves crash, I actually feel a moment of peace. It's… therapeutic. I feel like I can conquer the world. Until I realize: no, I still have two kids to deal with.
- 12:00 PM: Lunch at the Beach Restaurant. Chicken nuggets for the kids. (Shocking, I know). Salad for me. (Or, at least, I try to eat a salad).
- 1:00 PM: Back to the Beach– I attempt to read my book. I get two whole pages in before the kids start whining. I give up.
- 2:00 PM: Water Activities. Kayaks! We (read: I) attempt to kayak. The kids fight over who’s paddling. The kayak tips. We all get soaked. It's hilarious. (Afterward, when I'm dry).
- 3:00 PM: More Pool. Sanity restored, slightly.
- 6:00 PM: Dinner at the buffet. The tacos are now, surprisingly, excellent. Perhaps the margaritas are affecting my judgment.
- 7:00 PM: "Another" show. This time, it's… a karaoke night? My kids volunteered. Please, someone, send help.
- 8:00 PM: Bedtime (Again). Exhausted but triumphant.
Day 3: Dedicated to the Resort (mostly)
- 9:30 AM: Breakfast. Eggs, bacon, pancakes. Fuel for the day! And more coffee.
- 10:30 AM: Kids Club Drop-Off: A success! I feel a pang of guilt, but also a giddy sense of freedom. What to do with myself?
- 11:00 AM: SPA TIME! I am finally getting a massage. It's the only reason I picked this hotel. The massage itself is pure, unadulterated bliss.
- 12:00 PM: Lunch. I’m alone. I eat in peace. I taste the food. I savor it! I enjoy the ocean breeze.
- 1:00 PM: Free time by the pool.
- 2:30 PM: Kids Club Pick-Up. The kids are happy. They had fun. I had fun. This is truly a success.
- 3:00 PM: More Pool Time. Kids are surprisingly good.
- 5:00 PM: The Resort’s Restaurants. I decide to get fancy! There are many restaurants to chose from.

So, what *IS* this thing, anyway? Like, actually?
Is it worth it? (The big question, I know.)
What's the hardest part? Like, the *really* hard part?
What's the best part? Seriously, give me something good.
**Also**... cake? I think cake is pretty high up there.
Ever had a total disaster? Tell me about it. I want to live vicariously through your shame!
What advice would you give to someone just starting out?
What’s your biggest regret? (Don’t hold back!)
Is there anything you *don't* want to talk about? Like, *ever*?
What makes you happy? REALLY happy?


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